Confessions on Cause and Effect

My kids are going to grow up and talk about how they hated Brett and I saying "cause and effect" and "if you put things over people, you'll lose your things." These statements are said over and over again and even at their young ages I can hear them roll their eyes.

I confess....
Yesterday was a brilliant lesson in cause and effect. My kids are not allowed to slam doors. Molly decided to break the rule and slam the door in her brother's face. In return, Mark got so mad that he threw the door open and the door handle popped Molly in the eye.

I got to see this all go down from Molly's side of the door.

I confess....
Once I knew she wasn't really hurt we had a little talk about cause and effect. I think this face says it all.

I confess....
Every time I look at this picture, it cracks me up! It's just too pitiful for words! But don't worry, I didn't laugh in her face, I at least have that much control over my emotions.

I confess....
I went to a few Meet Up play dates this week. It's been so nice to get out of the house and have other grown ups to talk to. It's so weird not knowing anyone in the city. This is the most difficult part of moving that I completely underestimated.



Bubbles in the Park

I confess....
In Las Vegas our mailboxes were all together each box was locked. In NC, we've gone back to having our own individual box in front of the house. My kids new favorite activity is checking the mail. I have no idea what the fascination is, but they love getting to bring the mail in.




I confess....
I was attacked by fire ants yesterday. I forgot just how horribly painful fire ant bites are and I couldn't sleep last night. So I quit putting off hiring an exterminator and one will be here this afternoon. Bugs in the South, something I do not miss from my childhood.

I confess....
My 5 year old is obsessed with a CD her church preschool teacher gave her for Christmas. She plays the same song over and over again. It gets on my nerves, but it's pretty cute too. Isabella also wants me to dance with her. She's very bossy about how my dance moves should look.

She's 5 and my dance moves are already not cool. Lord help me!

What are you confessing this week?

Pooping at Table - Should We Judge?

In general I think we are far too judgmental towards parents who do things differently. And if I could ever begin to think that's not true all I need to do is go on Facebook and look at the latest Parents magazine post. This week they posted an article on whether kids should eat fast food occasionally. Of course the comments were mostly from self righteous mothers who have never fed their kids fast food since it's just the most horrible thing a parent could ever give their child. And then somehow the comments also started including that they don't allow their children to watch TV. Which is just as horrible of course according to these commenters.

I'm such a good mom that I let my kid drink the sweet and sour sauce.

Let me be clear, feed your kids whatever you want. I couldn't care less. I have no idea why so many parents make themselves feel better by making other parents feel bad. I really could care less how you're raising your kid as long as they are not being abused and neglected. That's where I start to care if you're being abusive or neglectful.

And then today's article popped up. About a kid pooping in a potty. In a restaurant. AT THE TABLE.

OK, I'm about to go all judgmental on that kid's parents. I know, I know he was with the nanny but who do you think told the nanny to bring the portable potty?

First of all, gross! That is disgusting! Who would let a kid poop in a portable potty in the middle of a restaurant? I don't give a crap that they were eating on the patio, being outside does not change the fact that people go there to eat! You have an obligation to the people around you to act like a decent human being. And in case you missed it, no one wants to watch someone poop while they eat, regardless of how old they are.

Second, why are you allowing your child to think it's OK to go to the bathroom in public? Bathrooms are private for a reason, it's a private bodily function! You're potty training a kid right? Teach them correctly from the beginning! I'm sure no one would allow a 45 year old man to use a portable potty at the table.

Third, pooping at the table is not a potty training method it's just rude entitlement behavior.

I have to say that I'm seriously worried about some kids growing up and thinking they can do anything they want. Oh wait, that's already happening and crap like this only makes it worse. What's the message to little Johnny? Don't think about others, you're the only one who matters so go ahead and poop at the table.

Parents please wake up! You need to be respectful to other people. And when you're allowing your kid to poop at the table you're sending the message loud and clear - I am the center of the universe and my needs and wants are all the matter. Do you really want your kids to grow up and model that behavior?

Lord I hope not!

So what do you think, should we judge parents for this level of disrespect?

Confidence My Son's New Weapon Against Cerebral Palsy

Something amazing has happened to Mark, he has become a confident brave little boy! For those of you who don't know his background, Mark has Cerebral Palsy and his gross and fine motor skills are still very delayed. Between daily stretching and PT and OT Mark has made huge strides but in the last 6 months he has overcome one of his biggest obstacles, fear!

From the very beginning his therapists said that Mark's fear was getting in his way. He never wanted to do anything unless he was 100 percent confident that he would succeed. And I'm not surprised that this is part of his personality considering how many times the poor kid has fallen and that he's ended up more scraps and bruises than I could ever count.

His latest battle scar.

We have really noticed a huge improvement in Mark in the last six months with his confidence. He doesn't hesitate as much anymore and he doesn't immediately ask for help when he's unsure. I notice his confidence the most when we are at the play ground. I took this video last week for two reasons. One, I was shocked that he was doing what he was doing and two, I knew Brett would be sad that he missed it.



I can't believe that my little guy climbed that rock wall! He did it again before we left and he had the biggest smile on his face. I loved seeing him looking so proud of himself. These are the moments that I hold onto when the bad days roll around.

So the girls don't feel left out, they climbed the rock wall too. Molly tried to climb over the top to the other side and Isabella got scared halfway up. She is a little fearful too. Just a little!

Strawberry Picking at Phillips Farm of Cary

This weekend we took the kids to a farm for their first time to pick strawberries. Well actually it was the first time they ever picked anything and their first time on a farm. I thought it would be fun but I had no idea how much fun we would have or that we would end up spending 3 hours there playing.

When we arrived at Phillips Farm of Cary the kids were very excited about the play area, but we wanted them to pick the strawberries first. At the ripe old ages of three and five we had to help the kids at first since they wanted to pick everything. What started out as a fun family outing turned into a science lesson. I love it when things work out that way. The kids were fascinated to see food growing out of the ground and that the green strawberries would eventually turn red. Mark loved the strawberries that were half green and half red and he showed me everyone!  After a few minutes they understood only to pick the red ones and they were off and running.

Mark was the big winner in the picking the most strawberries contest, he picked 3.4 pounds! Isabella was just over 3 pounds and Molly was just under 3 pounds. They had fun picking the strawberries and this little guy didn't want to wait for them to get cleaned.

After we were done picking the strawberries, we headed over to the play area. There was tons of stuff to do from corn hole to cow rides. My kids loved the slide, tractors, and feeding the goats.

Is that the coolest slide you've ever seen?

Cow Train Ride

We ended up staying in the play area for a little over two hours. We would have stayed longer but the dark clouds were blowing in and it was almost nap time. Brett and I had to drag the kids off the field and into the car. When we got home I realized that I had almost 9.5 pounds of strawberries to eat. I decided to make strawberry shortcake for dessert that night. After all it's one of my all time favorite desserts and the sweetest strawberries should go into dessert right?

My favorite picture of the day!

I'm so glad we moved to North Carolina and now my family can enjoy many days like Saturday. It was great spending the day outside and having fun together as a family. I think we are really going to like in here!

Have you ever taken your kids strawberry picking?


 

Social Media Blackout My Mother's Day Gift

I participated in a campaign on behalf of Mom Central Consulting for MetLife. I received a promotional item as a thank you for participating.”

This Mother's Day I'm going to give myself the gift of a social media blackout. Why? I want to spend the day being present with my children and truly be engaged with them and enjoy my day. I don't want to miss any moment of the day because I'm buried in my phone or trying to post a cute picture to Facebook. That can wait until Monday!  MetLife has created the #SocialBlackout movement, which challenges everyone to log off of social media on Mother’s Day (May 12th) and give Mom the time and attention she deserves!

I love Mother's Day! After all it's a day that I get to celebrate me so what's not to love? Usually I spend the morning and afternoon with my family alone and then we go to dinner with my mom and brother. I love that I get to be celebrated and I also get to make my mom feel special too!

But this Mother's Day is a first for me. I moved to North Carolina a few weeks ago and it will be my first Mother's Day spending the day without her. It's going to be a hard day for me without my mom here but my husband has planned some surprises and a fun lunch for us. And we will still take our traditional family photo before heading out to church on Sunday. I love these photos and I torture my family with one every year! And while I can't go a whole day without taking a picture or video, I am pledging to stay off of social media for the whole day.

Mother's Day 2012

 

 I love the idea of taking time away from social media for the day so I can truly be present and not miss a moment. I spend so much time on my computer working from home that it's difficult for me to unplug. But I'm up for the challenge. And our husbands and kids need to take the same pledge. This isn't just a challenge for moms; we all need to be present this Mother's Day! Now my kids are too little to participate, but I was easily able to get my husband on board with the pledge. To be fair, it's not a difficult thing I'm asking of him but I think he would give me diamonds if I asked for them right now after a move across the country.

I hope all of you will join the MetLife #SocialBlackout movement! It's the easiest event you can ever attend since you don't have to show up. MetLife created a cute profile picture alerting everyone that you're saying goodbye to social media for the day. It's a great way to share the information with all of your friends! You can learn more information on their Facebook page.

My kids seeing their first snail a moment too good to miss!

Why are your reasons for joining the #SocialBlackout?

What I Would Tell Myself the Day my Son was Diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy

I saw a video on Facebook where parents of special needs children stated what they would have told themselves when their kids were first diagnosed. The video had me in tears and it really got me thinking about what I would have told myself on the day that Mark was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy.




There are so many things that I could have said to myself looking back. I'm not sure in my grief that I would have heard anything that my future self said. It was such a dark time for us with so much uncertainty and a desperate feeling of being completely overwhelmed and scared.

I would tell myself

• It's OK to grieve, it doesn't make you a bad mom or person. The life you thought you were going to have is different now. It's OK to be upset about it. One day you'll be glad you felt your emotions purely since it allowed you to get to a place of acceptance quicker.
• You will find strength that you never could have imagined you would be capable of having and you will use it to fight for Mark.
• Join a gym now! The stress of having a special needs child will wreck havoc with your health. Future you found this out the hard way.
• You will start a blog and reach out to other parents of CP kids. They will teach you more than any book ever could and become your lifeline when things with Early Intervention go bad.
• Grow some thick skin lady! You will be shocked at the things said to you by doctors, strangers, friends, and family.
• Breath. Mark is the most amazing little boy and he will accomplish great things. He has a determination that will take your breath away.

If you have a child with special needs what would you tell yourself the day your child was diagnosed?

 

Confession Moving is Stressful

I confess....Turns out moving is far more stressful than I ever imagined. Sometimes I get a little too cocky for my own good.

I confess....When we were packing and everyone said that was stressful and it went without a hitch, I was all "I've got this in the bag. " I should have enjoyed that moment more.

I confess....Once the movers arrived the nightmare began. It was awful! No really picture me sobbing by the end of the day awful. This is unusual behavior for me, I normally don't let things like this bother me.

I confess....First the movers claimed they didn't know that they had to pack my kitchen. You know even with it being in our contract and all. Then they wanted more money. Of course and wouldn't move our stuff or unload our stuff. Third, they said they wanted - wait for it - $2,000 for my kitchen!

Say What?

Two things on the kitchen

1. How is it that my kitchen is $2,000 to move when the rest of the house is about $5,000? We weren't moving any appliances!
2. My kitchen is SO not worth $2,000. And that was if I packed it myself.

I confess....We finally worked out a deal with the mafia movers. I ended up packing part of my kitchen onto my car since we were shipping it. One box on the moving van of the really heavy stuff and the rest I left behind.

I confess....I declared my everyday dishes too ugly to move. I liked them 10 years ago when I was engaged and I picked them out. Not so much today.

They were left behind!

I confess....I think I already found new dishes and they are on sale this weekend! Gotta love that!

I confess....After the loading nightmare was over, the moving van not arriving nightmare began.

I confess....Our stuff came a week after it was promised and my family and I did some indoor camping.

I confess....We were unpacking fools when the van finally arrived. 30 hours after it pulled up we had the whole house unpacked and organized. (And yes I slept and ate and took care of three small children) The only thing we have left is to hang our pictures.

I confess....I cannot believe how quickly we got the house unpacked. Of course it does help that we sold, donated, or threw away about half of our stuff. It's amazing how much junk you acquire over the years!

I confess....Everything has been difficult about this move from the movers, to getting internet set up, and don't get me started on DirecTV guy! But we are finally getting settled in and if my TV can get set up today, I'll be a very happy girl.

Now, who wants to be my friend? That's the next step on this journey and it will be a long one.

What are your moving experiences?