Oct 16, 2011

What Would You Do? Part 2

Go ahead and read What Would You Do part one if you missed it so this post makes a little more sense.

Now for my poll results. 5 people said they would have left Mark and ran after the girls. This is your instinct when two children run away. When you see your child running into an unsafe environment, you go straight into panic mode. The rest of my voters said neither and most commented that they would have grabbed Mark and gone after them. I'm curious if you'll change your mind after I give the the whole story.

I didn't tell the whole story on purpose. There is a point to this story and you'll have to hang in to the end to get it.

Like I said, Isabella's preschool is on a college campus. There are no teachers standing outside helping with drop off/pick up. The building that she and Molly ran into was not her preschool, but a college building. Now allow me to further set the stage. Ten feet from my car were 2 police officers and a campus security officer. There were also about 20 adults standing around talking between classes. Having security there during drop off/pick up is common to keep things safe.

Now you can argue all day long with me on what I should/could have done, but the bottom line is that I was in a lose/lose situation. I either take the time to open the door, pull Mark out of a 5 point harness car seat and then run after the girls. Or I leave him there and get to the girls much faster. In either situation, I was going to have to put a child a risk. Don't even try to argue that, it's a fact.
I ran after the girls. I went straight into panic mode when they ran into that building. It's huge and who knows what could happen to them. As it was, they were halfway up the stairs when I got to them. Looking back, if I had taken the time to get Mark out, they would have been out of my sight. I think I made the right decision even if I had two bad choices to choose from. We can agree to disagree if you think differently.

Now lets go back to the two police officers and security guard that stood by and did nothing to help me. They should have stepped in and grabbed the girls since they ran right past them.

Wait, I'm going to repeat myself so you don't miss it.

Now lets go back to the two police officers and security guard that stood by and did nothing to help me. They should have stepped in and grabbed the girls since they ran right past them.
The two police officers took an oath to serve and protect. That is their job. A three year old and a one year old don't understand the danger of their actions, but the two cops do. And they chose to do nothing!

Oh wait, that's not right they did do something.

They harassed me when I returned to the car and told me that my son was out of my sight for 1 minute. I'm so glad that they timed it instead of helping. Then continued by telling me that it was illegal to leave a kid in a locked car and that they could have me arrested. Blah, blah, blah, later I left shaking in anger. How dare these men not do their job and refuse to help me and then harass me? I didn't go into a store to shop, I ran after two kids. I felt confident in the one second decision making time I had that the officers would not let someone take Mark.

Now finally for the point of my story. It's really not about what decision I made since I didn't have a great choice either way. It's about the three officers and approximately 20 other adults that did nothing to help me. You know how they got into the building so fast? A man held the door open for them as I screaming at them to stop. Who does that?

Why did no one help me? Why is our society so quick to judge and not to help? Why are we so afraid to step in and do something? We act like if it's not our kids, it's not our problem. I received several emails about this from people that wanted to respond privately. Why? Because they did the same thing I did and they don't want anyone to judge them. One mom said that she was afraid to comment on my blog since it might get her in trouble. I understand that, it crossed my mind too. But I wanted to make my point.
It doesn't matter whose child is in danger, we should all care and we should all do something to help.


  1. I've had my 2 year old run out into the middle of the road, crossed the street while I was very pregnant, and dealing with one of my other kids, while at the park. About 5 other moms watched him. They then began talking crap about me, when I finally caught him, spanked him and yelled at him for doing something like that.

    Why do we judge so quickly? If more people stopped and helped, then maybe there would be less kids getting hurt.

    Stupid people for not helping you. I would have. Sorry you had to go through this. It is not fun at all. You did the right thing.

  2. Lose/Lose for sure! And I am appalled that no one stepped in to help you....appalled!!! As for the police officers and security guards, shame on them. I bet you had a million things you SHOULD have said to them after the fact....i know I do! I changed my mind on my vote...LOL! Terrible situation Allison and you did what you had to do! People today...

  3. I've seen kids run off many times, and I will always try to stop them. I don't care who's kid it is, I go into protection mode & stop this child.
    One time I was ten minutes late to a birthday party because when I ran into Barnes & Noble for a gift, a child was crying in an aisle. There was an adult on the other side, but I wasn't sure if the child belonged to this adult. I wasn't going to just walk away from a crying child; but I also didn't want to walk into the middle of... it could have been a time out. After I was sure this was the case (a young child crying about not getting something he wanted) and the child was safe, I walked away.
    I've stopped kids who run off in Disneyland after getting off a ride (Buzz Lightyear Astro-blasters is a perfect place for your child to run off- and it exits to a store. Parent nightmare!)
    Once our baby (he was maybe 2, but I think slightly younger) ran out of the little playground at Toontown. My husband was watching him & his older sister, while I'd taken our oldest on the rollercoaster. Let's just say we were lucky that I was heading back just as he'd run out. NOBODY tried to stop this TINY CHILD from running away in a busy theme park!

    Some people are jerks.

    I would have either run after your girls, or ran towards your car to watch the child in the carseat as I screamed for you to "Go get the other kids! I'll watch him for you!"
    I can't even imagine the panic of your kids running into a college building. I'd have had some words to say to the police who didn't help you, I can assure you. What an awful situation.

    Could you maybe, in the future, put the one year old in a baby carrier, so you are free to hold the hands of the other two until everyone is in the car? Just an idea. Again, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Especially the fact that NONE of the adults around tried to help you.

  4. Ridiculous. Beyond ridiculous. If anything like that ever happens to me, I think I'll just shout at the cops to please either watch or catch my children. Not that I should have to. But I've learned from your situation that maybe some police need to be reminded when to do their job. Sigh.


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