Jun 6, 2012

Pour Your Heart Out-I Fantasize About a Night Away Alone

I love staying in hotels! I love going to the pool, being in a room I don't have to clean, and feeling like I'm on vacation even if I'm still in town. Brett and I get a hotel occasionally on our anniversary for a night away from the kids. And it's always fun and we go home rested and excited to see our kids again.

But here is the part that I can't say out loud.

I fantasize about getting a hotel for the night all by myself! No kids, no husband, no friends, just me.

I can't say this out loud because once upon a time some group of moms got together and told the world that they don't need anything besides their kids and that they cannot be without them even for a second. And that the women who do need/want a break from their kids are selfish and bad moms.  Can I just say that I want to kill those women? Why do you have to make yourself feel better by making me feel bad?

But back to my night at a hotel. I would love to get a room and go sit by the pool in peace. I wouldn't have to do a constant 1,2,3, kid count and watch my kids like a hawk. I could even have a pretty little cocktail that comes in a piece of fruit with a fancy umbrella. Then I could order room service and read a book in peace. Or I could watch some really trashy TV like Dance Moms without comments from the peanut gallery.

The next morning I would wake up when I wanted to not when I sense a little person standing next to me. No need to pop out of bed and start breakfast for the kids. I could get ready leisurely.

And here is the best part of my night away, I'm sure I would miss Brett and the kids and be very happy to see them the next morning. And I would be rested and relaxed and ready to be a mom again. I don't see that happening anytime soon though, which is why it's a fantasy.

Dare to dream right?


  1. I'll admit that I was one of those "who would leave their kids" type moms for the first 7 1/2 months. My boys are 8 months now and I hate that I thought that. Time is away is necessary and makes you a better mom. At least I think so and want to try it out and see. A night away, by myself sounds absolutely heavenly.

  2. Hi, just stopping by from Shell's Pour Your Heart Out. My sister actually does this every Mother's Day Weekend. It is the one thing she really asks for all year long. She pretty much does everything you described and she said it is heaven. I personally do not see anything wrong with it whatsoever, especially if it's just once a year. Mothers need time away, to themselves. All of us are different. I say go for it and there's no reason to feel bad about it! :)

  3. I soooooooo hear you on this! I do this on rare occasions and, frankly, it's FANTASTIC for everyone involved. I get to relax and have some pure, unadulterated me time which, let's face it, is hard to do when a short person might burst in at any moment demanding that you deal with bodily fluids. Tuning out friends' and family members' commentary and expectations and just focusing on myself helps me be a more grounded, present person which ends up being great for everyone else too since Dragon Lady Me is not that great to spend time with.

    It's also good for my husband and daughter because they get a special time to connect with each other too. And by the time I'm back we've all missed each other and are coming from much better perspectives.

    So I say if you can swing it, go for it! And if anyone starts coming at you with the "Oh I could never, ever, ever be away from my precious children! I love them SOOOO much! Why don't you?!" stuff you can inform them that while that's just fine, it's also fine to model healthy self-care behaviors for your kids and to do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself so you're the best you can be for you and your family. Which is different for everyone but, in your case, involves a rare but well deserved day of unlimited naps and room service. ;-P

  4. Nothing wrong with wanting that! I actually had two kid-free nights in a hotel this past week and it felt SO good. And then I came home to be a less stressed out mama.


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