May 30, 2014

The Time I Turned Into Psycho Mommy and Got Outsmarted

My husband says that I have a tendency to overreact to situations, generally speaking. He may or may not be right on the money with his assessment. Things that are sure to set me off are; technology that isn't working, whining kids, not being able to locate items in my home, and my kids destroying stuff. The latter is what made psycho mom come out.

Lately my kids have decided that things don't matter. I blame myself from the millions of times I've lectured them by saying "people are more important than things, so when you put a thing over a person, you will lose your thing." While that is great advice/threat to make them stop fighting over toys, I didn't mean to imply that things don't have any value. I can only come to the conclusion that that is exactly the lesson that they learned after recent events.

In the last week they have ripped up far too many books and I caught them flushing the pieces of Hi Ho Cherry-O down the toilet. Now a calm rational mom might have explained in a sweet voice that potties aren't for toys. "We only put pee pee and poo poo in the potty honey" calm, patient, medicated, understanding mommy says while smiling.

Well that is not me! 

I have a tendency to overreact! First I sent them all to their rooms so I could think for a minute. Normally this calms me down but it didn't that day. The internal dialogue was too much for me that day. I was outraged that my kids didn't treat their toys with respect. Don't they know toys costs money? Don't they know money doesn't grow on trees? Holy crap, why is my mother's voice in my head?

I grabbed some trash bags and went into the girls' room first. And like a maniac I yelled that if they didn't want to treat their toys right, I would take them away as I bagged up the toys.

Did they care?

Nope! And unfortunately for them they said they didn't care so I bagged even more things. up all the stuffed animals and dress up clothes too. That move stopped my girls from poking the bear and they decided they would at least pretend to care for a minute. I went into my son's room and repeated the process. He was smart enough not to poke the bear.

After Psycho Mom Took Away the Toys

By now the kids were crying and I feel like they learned a valuable lesson and of course they will be sad that I took away all their favorite toys right?

Wrong! Dead wrong!

I got myself all worked up and dragged 7 bags of toys and a huge doll house up attic stairs and they didn't even care that their toys are gone. In fact they are playing with toys more than ever for the last few days even though all the favorites are gone. They haven't even asked when they are going to get their toys back! Are you freaking kidding me? They were supposed to learn a valuable lesson!

Well someone learned a lesson, but it wasn't the kids. 

Turning into psycho mom and bagging up toys was only a punishment for me. My kids were perfectly happy with the toys that remained.

When my husband got home my daughters announced that they were going to use their ballet outfits as dress up clothes. Now I can't prove it but I'm pretty sure my six year old looked at me with an expression that said "suck it mom, we outsmarted you again."



  1. Oh my gosh!! That is too funny! Kids are smart and they can work together too! They can make Mom and Dad at odds too! My oldest is now 31 and he is still good at this!! So funny!! I just wanted to say I can relate and I bet a lot of parents can too!!! Thanks for sharing!!

    1. Thankfully my kids haven't learned how to put mom and dad at odds. I'm not looking forward to that day. It's been a week and they still haven't asked for their toys back. At this point I'm going to see how long it takes for them to bring it up.

  2. That so looks like that's what she's saying! I'm working on not doing things that are a punishment for me. My newest thing is to ignore the chaos and go read.

  3. I should say... as long as there isn't blood being shed or about to be shed.


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